Coloring in the lines

My daughter (3.5 years old) loves to color and create art. Crayons, markers, paint, you name it. During the week it is normal for us to have an hour of art time at the kitchen table AFTER she has attended a full day of preschool.

We pull out paper, stickers, markers, pipe cleaners in all colors, googley eyes. (Hit up the Dollar Store- more economical than Target/Walmart and for this "level" of creating just as effective), and go to town. Each time I try to get out a different combination of the supplies to keep things fresh.

Some days I make an example or idea piece. Draw a horse, or cut out a bat. More than anything this is to give her idea of what is possible.  I don't really ask her, or even encourage her to re-create what I made. I encourage her to make her own creation.

Lately these projects have tended to be more about drawing/coloring. By her choice.  I love to let her create and I ask after the fact for her to explain what she has drawn. We talk about why she chose certain colors for items and I remind her that water doesn't have to be blue and the sun doesn't have to be yellow (or orange! if you are from "that" camp). Sometimes I bring up the book The Day the Crayons Quit (a great read) as a discussion item. But I have never said "You are doing a such good job coloring in the lines!"

Why do we say that? Every time I hear it, it just sucks the creativity out of me. And I'm 34! An adult with a reasonably developed sense of self. It makes me want to pack up all the art supplies and watch tv.

Yet people say it. ALL. THE. TIME. Grandparents. Teachers. Other parents. MY SPOUSE, father of my children. Why do we care if they color in the lines? Because it shows some sense they are conforming to our norms? Because we think it is a sign of "progress" which as parents sometimes is hard to see between the endless laundry and meal prep and potty accidents. Or because it is good fine motor skills development? Yep. All of these things.

There are a MILLION other ways to help them develop fine motor control. Without sucking the creativity out of everything. Without telling them the ONLY acceptable way to interact with a project is to fill in someone else's lines, ideas, plans for the world.  When they are little and learning not just how to control their tiny fingers, but their minds…let's not box them in.

Next time you are with a child coloring. Consider these conversation starters instead:

• I love what you have done. Tell me about your picture.
• Ohhh…I've never seen a purple Elephant, what else could we draw using purple?
• You choose green for the water! Awesome, looks like the ocean. Do you know what letter green starts with? 

And my favorite…

What a great job coloring in the water and boat in this picture. What else could you add to it. Birds? Another boat? Pirates? Humm…a treasure map?!

Looking for ways to help develop fine motor control? Try these!

• Practicing writing letters.
• Eating with utensils.
• Painting finger nails (of course in the bathroom with the room sealed off with 500 yards of plastic). 
• Threading ribbon into cereal or cardboard with holes punched out. 
• Popping packing bubbles.
• Gluing dry beans to paper to make designs. 
• Cutting canned green beans with a plastic knife.